Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

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Ey hornboy give es a SCAB

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A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

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A Jew, an atheist, and an Asian man walk into a bar. They all have a drink and then go home to their families

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

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Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? Because recently she has been missing payments on the elictric bill because of economic hardships.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

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roses are red, bitches are blue close your damn legs and use a condom too.

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How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

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NEVER

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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VITAMIN C!

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Knock Knock. Who's There. Teenage Pregnancy

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

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What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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