Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Suicide is never the answer. Unless you ask me what I contemplated after I found out that my family was killed in a horrific traffic accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

penis

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

thumb_up thumb_down -15

In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red Olives are Black come to my and will smoke some crack

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops