Roses are red Violets are blue Lemons are yellow

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

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What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

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Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

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What happens when you give a boy a cookie? He falls asleep and his parents think he was kidnapped by a serial killer.

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So three nazis walk into a B.A.R

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

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were at work systems r down

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What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Oh you expected a funny joke? Oh well

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What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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joke

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One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

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A dog walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "What can I get for you?" The dog replies "1 beer please." shocked at the dogs English the bartender sprints out of the bar in terror

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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