A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

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What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

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What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

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What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

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How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

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A retarded man waks ito aaa baar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

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Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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ewrg

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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Face Hunter is scum

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

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Three mexicans walk into a bathroom they all had to go pee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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