If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +36

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Buzi vagy!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

The WNBA is on the cooking channel

thumb_up thumb_down +32

knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

thumb_up thumb_down +30

I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

thumb_up thumb_down +30

why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops