Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

Where can I apply for janitor school?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

Is a tomato a vegetable? Depends if it is comatose.

Want to hear a joke? No.

how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

How do you fall off a building... JUMP.

The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? He's blind. Also he is dead.

How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb? None. They are blind and do not care if it is light or dark in their surroundings.

How do you stop an oncoming bus? You push a stroller in front of it.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

This is funny.

Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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