Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

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How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

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Wait! hundred billions!

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

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Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

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What do you call a black kid with no parents? A black orphan.

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The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

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Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

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I went to work today....

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

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what do santa clause and a blueberry have in common they both have beards....except the blueberry

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What do you call a man with no legs, arms, or a head? A torso.

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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