What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

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A man sees the most beautiful woman he's ever seen on the street. He takes her into a dark alley and r.apes her.

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

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why was the boy crying he had cancer

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why did the baby stop crying his mother killed him with an axe

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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what did the dog say to the cat? give me back my dog food.

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Error 37.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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An Englishman walks into a bar.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

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Did you hear about the alter boy that wasn't molested by a priest?

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what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

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what's red and horny a red unicorn

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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What do you call a zebra without stripes? A stripeless zebra.

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Why did the Germans conquer Poland so quickly? Heavy military manufacturing and Blitzkrieg battlefield tactics.

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Knock Knock CUM IN!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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