What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure _._._

Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

What do you call a lot of goose in one place? geese

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

TRICERATOPS!

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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