The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

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What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

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What did the taxi driver say when the black man got in to his taxi? Where to sir?

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Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

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How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

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What did the old man say? Im old

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Do you want to hear a shit joke? Stuart.

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Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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