how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

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How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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what happened to the man who is standing in the rain? he got wet

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

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What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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