Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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what happened to the man who is standing in the rain? he got wet

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

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A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

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where do some birds live in? Earth

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

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( . Y . )

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Will there be love in your future? Click the hand with the love-line that is closest to yours

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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