Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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What do you do when you see a black man limping in your yard? You invite him inside, ask him what happened, and possibly call an ambulance if, God forbid, the situation is that serious.

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What do you get when you cross an orange with a gerbil? A mailbox that lights up when you open it

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How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

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whats my name? Matt

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Rosie are red velvet blue I made eggs just for you

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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THe Election

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What's a Mexicans favourite video game? It depends on his/her personal preferences.

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Bum: Excuse me, can you spare some change? Rich man: No

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How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

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Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

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Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He got AIDS and died.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Legolas They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard!

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What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

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How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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