How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

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What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What kind of gun cant shoot bullets Hand guns

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

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are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

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Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

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A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? --probably just one, unless cerebral palsy runs in her blood, therefore her aid would assist her.

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

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That's funnier than a zebra climbing the Eiffel tower with Bill Clinton on the 4th night of quanza

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

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What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

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Why do jews have big noses? Because the air is free!

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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