How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

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There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

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What would you do if I said a horse ate your mother? It doesn't mattet, I didn't

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So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

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What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

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Q: What's so special about my Ferrari? A: It was painted with babies

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops