Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

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If you throw a violist and a soprano off a cliff, which one would hit the ground first? Who cares?

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What colour is chocolate? Brown.

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A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what will you have". The man says "Friendship" and bursts out crying. At this point he is making a scene and security will have too be called.

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

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What's worse then getting kicked in the face by Chuck Norris? A: Nothing

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We are not familiar with the specific circumstances, therefore its difficult to determine exactly why.

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What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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Hey I just met you, and your f$#king crazy,I ate your pizza, so go get me another one!!

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What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

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What is a jew in space? Dead

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops