Without geometry life would be pointless

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Okay, yeah red, but you wont ever get to see it because you have gone stale.

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One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

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What do you call a man with no penis? WOahMan! O_o

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are many things that could be considered worse than finding a worm in one's apple. In addition, the matter of better or worse depends upon the point of view of the person in question, so what is worse than finding a worm in one person's apple may be preferable to finding a worm in another person's apple.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

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Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

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Shit, I can't think of anything to write. That does not mean I'm black

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Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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Knock Knock who's there? ... who's there?!?!?! ... WHO'S THERE ?!?!?!? ... stupid kids.

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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I walked across a lake once. Someone said "JESUS CHRIST!" to which I replied with "YES?"

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Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

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tomatoe tomato my toe is named tom

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whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it.

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how many jews can you fit into a car 5, two in the front three in the back

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How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

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Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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What do you get if you cross an Irishman with a Brazilian Aristocrat? I don't know.

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What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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