A baby seal walks into a club.

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars...except for the duck

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yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

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What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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why was the man on the roof? he was about to commit suicide.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

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A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

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How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

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Why did the Gay person fall down? He got shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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