Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: None. It is a sick and depraved act that is probably illegal anyway.

why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

Why should you never trust anglers? Because they're always into fishy business... Why should you never trust hunters? Because they carry loaded guns...

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: In order to avoid being mauled by a coyote.

A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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