Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Knock knock! Who's there? IT DOESN'T MATTER, YOU'RE NOT COMING TO MY HOUSE!!!! *closes door*

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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What did tyler say to Jake? My pussy is wet jew

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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How did the black kid pass his exam? He studied.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Your d is so small that when you had a boner and walked into the wall....... YOU BROKE YOUR NOSE! Millimeter Monster bro

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I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

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why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

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Yo mama's fat.

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How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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