Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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What did the man with aids say? "I'm dying and there is nothing you can do about it"

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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the best thing about an anti-joke is when the punch line doesn't hit you, you feel no pain

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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24

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There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from K.F.C

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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A Native American walks into a casino. He wants to invest a protion of his earnings from his fortune 500 company into it because he believes it to be a profitable venture.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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