Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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three people walked into a bar and there was a blackman,a jew,a white man and a nazi bartendor which ones did he shoot? The black and the jew and the white man

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What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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What do you call a barn full of black people? antique farm equipment.

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A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

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a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Yo Momma is not fat.

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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Your mom.

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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"what's fat,stupid,and has a shell" "i don't know what" "you, i lied about the shell"

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You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

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What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

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Massie is a fatass

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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