what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. What is the difference between Jesus and and a picture of Jesus? A. It takes one nail to hang the picture Not trying to offend anyone just a joke to be clear

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Ben Affleck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Todd have intimacy problems? He was molested as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +6

there once was a teacher who wouldnt shut up she just rambled and rambled and rambled ,untill one day i brang a gun to school and shot her ,she doesnt rambled anymore and i dont go to school anymore =win for everyone

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happened to the toddler on the swing? She was left unatended and was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops