Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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I'm 23, just like most people my age.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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what good about eatting every night knowing that a african want

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Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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What did the dog say when the tiger bit him? Nothing. Dogs don't talk.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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why do we have school? 2 learn duh y r u even askin? ur STOOPIDE!

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

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Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

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What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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