A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

Ps. I am getting green thumbs, which is weird, I never even expected for anyone to even bother to read my fucking long comments,but then again... As my wife said, " I am not pissed at the fact that members of my movement dont depend too much of my advice in order to get along in life for nothing". True, while horsehead network might mock me, and my "blood family hate and/or fear me" It takes only a look into my wife`s eyes to feel like a God... All while I got many thousand members of Neronism worldwide waiting for me to cope with my past so they can worship me (which pisses me off, it was never my intention, I give them life advice on how to shape their own life, not on how to cling to me). Nero: Neronism, look it up, join me, stop looking for the answers in religion, but stand up for yourself and realize that there is no reason to wait for life after death, when we together, can create heaven on earth. Yes esteemed members, I am back on my feet, and I am wearing my ortopedic arm made of steel again, consider it symbolism. Its free btw, your money is worthless to me, if you choose to see life for what it is in the eyes of a true human being, then you on the other hand, are worth as much as I am... What I am worth is something I will leave up to your opinion, because sure as fuck if I dont consider myself better than people most already. Its time to push forward again, led by a fist of steel.

Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

Q: What did the racoon say to the cow? A: Nothing, because neither have the extansive intillect to speak in a manner that the other would understand.

Three women are seen walking while having ice cream. One of them is licking the ice cream. Another is sucking the ice cream, and the other one is biting the ice cream. One of these women is married. Which one is married? The one that has a wedding ring on her finger.

Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

Roses are Red, violets are blue,love can not tell how much I love you!!

Is J.P. dumb? Yes

What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

What happened to the guy who drank poison? he died.

What's the square root of yo mama? That which when multiplied by itself equals yo mama.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? Hope.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What's not pink and fluffy? Rape.

Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

how many pancakes does it take to build a dog house? none boats don't have wheels.

A man walks into a bar. What does he say? A: Ow.

What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

The turd said crazy turd so many cows have ninety two ears and it walked away to the store and drank doors while juggling feces and racist jack-o-lanterns.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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