oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

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Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

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BOB:i feall like a hotdog JOE:u r what u eat BOB:no wonder your a d!(k JOE:f*** u

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

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Want to know a joke? There is no joke.

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

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What do you call a white guy with no friends? A white guy with no friends

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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What do you call a baked bean falling from 10,000 feet? A baked bean

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How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

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What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

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Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops