non poop

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Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

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A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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-Why did the chicken cross the road? '' I dont know '' -Because it would cross the road and over to you. -Knock knock? '' Who's there?'' - CHICKEN!!!!!!!

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Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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what is the most efficient way to scratch your balls? hire a leprechaun slave.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8

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Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

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Why did so many describe Billy as glued to the t.v.? A terrible case of bullying and superglue resulted in the inability of Billy to remove himself from his own t.v., causing immense feelings of revenge, but his inability to move left these feelings unfulfilled.

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Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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What's the point of going to college? There is none.

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What's better than r a p e? Consensual sex.

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Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops