what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

Yo mammas so fat you know what, i think she might die!!

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

Knock Knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny your son let me in mom! Son, I have something to tell you. What? Well, you're actually adopted *sobs*

What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

I don't mind gays unless they shove it down people's throats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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