What happen when a penguin walks into a bar? That is an almost impossible occasion. Penguins first of all waddle not walk and they only live in Antarctica and zoos, therefor they will not be able to enter one unless Antarctica becomes populated.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

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Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

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How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

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Aodhan, Kevin, Taggart and Caoimhin walk into a bar. They have drinks and then leave.

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair.

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What did the boy's mother say to her daughter when she walked in on her father having sex with her grandmother? The grandfather said "how are you"? He wasn't a part of that fiasco. However I'm sure that whoever saw what was confused and looking for answers.

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Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

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How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

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what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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What do you get when you cross an orange with a gerbil? A mailbox that lights up when you open it

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your grandpa's dead So are you.

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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What do you call a bunch of hobos having sexual intercourse? A soup kitchen

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How do you identify a Chinese tank? They smash their own people.

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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