What's worse than 10 babies stapled to a tree? The Holocaust.

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

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How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

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Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

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wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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That was me, I thought we where friends now... I am so sorry, I really did not send anyone nor anything, I would never do such a thing! What happened to you is terrible, I did say I knew who they where and that they are in prison, but that was a lie, I just wanted for you to think I was really confident and in control. Please Nero, let me speak to you, nothing is like you think, Jenny is my stepmother, please don't do anything.

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What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

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Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

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OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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New mission: refuse this mission

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

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what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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