Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

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My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

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Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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This joke might just be dumb enough for YOU to find funny

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What do you call a man with no arms? A: A Man with no arms.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple

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What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

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Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

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Mahmy

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

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mangos mandarins mushrooms mustache :{

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my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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Why didn't the cow go to the candy store It had diabetes poor cow :(

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What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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