Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

Cat ate a battery, did volts.

What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

Why did the Chicken cross the Road? To get to the other side! (To fully appreciate the subtle nuisances of this joke, you really have to be a chicken.)

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

Well, you see, I'm an extractor fan.

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

A vodka please Sir this is McDonald's Ok sorry, a McVodka please

Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

Roses are red Violets are silly Grease up your flaps Cause here comes my willy!

Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

haha black people :D

We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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