Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch porn daily.

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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Your mom is so fat, she had a heart attack and died. It was very sad and she will be missed.

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What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

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What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

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oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

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I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

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Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

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Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, he is very fond of animals and would never want to shoot them.

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Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

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Penis

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

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Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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