Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

What's up? Your time.

Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

So there we were, climbing Mount Kjerag and we take a break. So I decided to tell you a joke. "Isn't this nice, just hanging around? See it's funny because we're suspended over 1000 metres in the air by our harnesses, except that you're not because I cut yours and now you're falling and you're gonna die." But I had done all that before I told you the joke so you didn't hear me and now I'll have to cut my harness and try to catch up to you so I can repeat myself. Great job, ya prick.

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

Why did the Old man die? He died of old age.

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

Why does a woman with a little dark skin and black hair a Native American? Because she smells.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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