What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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Yes!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!! Yes!!!

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What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

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what do u call a fat guy in a pool u

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

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Q: Why did the boy not laugh at the Anti Joke? A: Because he has no sense of humor

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Why was the little boy speechless? His best friend was just run over by a plow truck.

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There was this fruit joke, but it had no punchline.

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Why did the chicken cross the road... so people could keep asking that question for 4000 years

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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What do you do with a Jewish kid with add( attention deficits disorder)? Send him to a concentration camp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops