I got a new jacket. The jacket had real cotton inside the sleeves. The next day my new jacket was gone, but the one i bought yesterday wasn't.

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Turkeys are obese

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

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What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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Anti-Joke.com Post anonymously with no editing!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a rabbit? A dead rabbit...

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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