rofl lol, the joke below me has made my computer offer to translate this page. It thinks it's in Spanish

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Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

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In Soviet Russia, this joke is an anti-joke.

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How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

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Q: What's the difference between a child dressing as a ghost for Halloween and a real ghost? A: About a tablespoon of arsenic.

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Q: Why was the math book sad? A: Because he recently found out that his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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Three black men walk into a bar. One of the men, having recently reached sobriety, opts not to commence in the consumption of alcohol. The other two, impressed by his level of restraint, decide to leave the bar and take the initiative to turn their lives around for the better.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A Blonde, a brunette, and a redhead where hiding from the police They were all shot and all died because they were playing Grand Theft Auto 5

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david give me my money back... i will have it next week

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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what is green an invisible? this cabbage

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what is yellow with red all over tweety in a blender

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Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

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Roses are red, violets are blue No they're not, violets are violet

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What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

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Why was the baker rich? Because he had a lot of money

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

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what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? Lawyers exist, are alive and despite all claims to the contrary, can withstand sunlight, garlic and the sign of the cross. They also have reflections and whilst they may eat black pudding from time to time they don't depend on blood as a source of nutrition.

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You tie a noose around your neck, you jump off a cliff and before you hit the ground you shoot yourself in the head.

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three people come to a serial killers house. one was annoying one was immature and one was stupid he would put them all in the same boat. then he towed it into shark infested waters, sunk it and watched them speak their mind. the annoying one said "nah nah nuh boo boo you cant eat me!" the immature one said "im gonna ride one!" and the stupid one said "could you please tell your sharks to stop eating my leg? i need it to swim away from these sharks that are eating my leg." moral of the story: dont go to serial killers homes. they will most likely kill you.

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How many pencils does it take to get an A on a test? Actually it takes knowledge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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