What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Why does people with tourettes curse so much? Fuck should I know?

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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One below was by me: Walter H

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What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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...The new series of spinoff movies from the worlds most frightening franchise! Pretty Normal Activity: Doing the groceries *****-Did not scare me at all :D! Ballbusters movie rentals *****- The demon never showed up which made this the scariest movie ever! Could not sleep for months... Whatyumean there is nothing paranormal in this? Aww FU*beep*CK!! Sumgay Inthestreet Journal *****-Pissed myself just from hearing the title got a stroke and almost died!, was it another Paranormal movie you said? Most overhyped comment we could find. Goddamn exaggerated movie reviews that fooled me into buying the original and expect something actually scary :(

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A mute man writes a joke that would only be funny to blind people.

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Men

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When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

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Why did the boy fall off the swings? He had no arms.

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Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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