A muslim walks through a medal detector before the entrance of the airport terminal. The alarm goes off and he is arrested by TSA officials, they open his jacket and find 30lbs of high explosives.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I've often heard that a room with a million monkeys with a million typewriters, given enough time; would eventually reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare. This seems to suggest that if something has an extremely low chance of happening, it will still eventually happen if enough attempts are made. However, I feel that the aforementioned scenario, given enough time to play out, would only result in a room full of dead monkeys. Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't go to you anyways.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? To see outer space

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Actually a better question would be, why is the chicken near a road in the first place?

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WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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What's 9+ 10?! 19

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

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Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

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Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

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Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

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What's the difference between an apple and a fruit? None

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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