What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey.

Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

( . Y . )

You Know what worse than having 10 Kids? Having Eleven

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy are all sitting on a park bench. They share several minutes of uncomfortable silence due to cultural differences.

How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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