what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

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How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

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Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

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could switching to Geico save you 15% or more on car insurence? Does a bear shit in the woods?

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kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

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How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

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Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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