why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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Why did samba hurt her head? Because she fell out of her mum muff

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

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What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

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A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

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You know whats funny Aids

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Depends on the situation. In a formal environment you would call him Mr Dalgleish, in an informal one it would be acceptable to call him Kenny, Kenneth or just Ken.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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