Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Legolas They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard!

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What's a Mexicans favourite video game? It depends on his/her personal preferences.

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What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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Why was the African Americanfemale at an abortion clinic? Because she just killed a child.

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watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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hi anti joke

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Have you ever ate a donut? Yes I have. In fact, the donut I ate recently was fairly delicious.

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A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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What is a 6.9? A period getting in the way of a good time!

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

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Roses are red, Violets are red, you are a liar, oh wait you're not!! MY BACKYARD'S ON FIRE

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Adam Turkolowoskiaklfadjufsdjksbgsgsafafdsg

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dassa

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What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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