what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Why was six afraid of seven. It wasnt because numbers cant possible show emotions. I

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whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? I didn't say anything because it isn't living and it can't talk because it is impossible.

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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A couple is playing chess. The man then chokes his wife to death, throws her body in a woodchopper, and eats her like cereal- Frost

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

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Q.What did the homeless kid get from santa? A. Play Doe. Because he was a good boy. Q.what did the Rich Kid get form santa? A Coal. Because he was a bod boy. The rich kid then got mad and threw the coal at the homeless kid hitting him on the head which killed him of enturnaly bleeding.

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Chuck Norris walks in to a bar then many people greet him because of his celebrity status.

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A lawyer met with his client and said.. well, there is some good news and some bad news The bad news is that you're going to prison for life.

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Your moma is so nasty. And one day she had a geust over and the geust says " May I use the restroom?" Yes but make sure you use the coffe can to the right because the letf one is full.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

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How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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