What do an elephant and a grape have in common? Well, depending on your ideological views they are either both God's creations or two examples of species which have evolved over time. That is all.

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A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

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Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

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How come there aren't any Mexicans on Star Trek? The show already had several minority characters, and the producers felt that the addition of a Hispanic actor or actress would have added nothing of value to the series.

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What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

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So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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A horse walks into a bar. He called him Arthur. Those are two sentences.

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Yo mama's so white, she's an albino!

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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why did radio not get the song? beacause he radio didnt work.

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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PhilosopherCon: "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?"

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I had a really great joke to tell you!

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Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

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What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

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are u black unlucky

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*insert corny "a man walks into a bar" joke here*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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