Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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Does 2 + 2 = fish? No.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

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What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

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LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

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What is the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? A dolphin is not a ghost

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why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

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justin littleton being sucessful

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

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why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

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Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

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What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

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Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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why did the black man go to court he was a lawyer it's is job

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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