A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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A bunch of nuns were riding a three-seat bicycle. The seats were comfy and no one complained.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

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What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

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Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

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what do u get when you cross a monkey, a sock and wheels? A: a sock monkey. I was kidding about the wheels

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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This is in Spanish when you're not looking.Just kidding, that's not possible. It's actually German.

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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What happened to the disabled man who went to Disneyland? He had a great time.

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Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

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3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

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Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

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Infamous last words: "Phew these Germans are finally gonna let us take a shower! Okay who farted! And do not lie because it smells like gas in here!" "Oh Crickey! That reptoil looks dangerous! Good thing I am immune to reptoils... Wait are Manta-Roys reptoils? uh oh..." "Hi OJ dear! Say hello to my brothe..." Moral: Hmm my chest hurts I wonder if... YAAAAaaaaaaaaaaRAGHGHGhGHGHG *dead* RESURRECTION! Phew...

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tell ur mom i love her before i die this would have been a better ending to the tintanic

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops