Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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If life though you lemons, through skittles at them and say tast the freakin rainbow.

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The global news

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar, has a few drinks, chats with some fans, and leaves. The very next day, Justin Bieber is out buying groceries.

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Q:Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? A:Because she had no arms.

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What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? No one... you have no friends.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops