Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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Knock Knock... Who's there? The FBI, you're going to jail. Really? No.

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What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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A Chinese man a Mexican and an American are all on a plane. They are all trying to get rid of stuff they have to much of in their country. The chinese man throws out a bowl of rice and says " we have to many of these in our country" the mexican throws out a taco and says " we have to many of these in our country" the American throws out the mexican and says "we have to many of these in our country"

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I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

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How did the black kid pass his exam? He studied.

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what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

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What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? Hi, my name is Chris.

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So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? The Holocaust

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If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

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Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

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It sucks if you have amnesia. It sucks if you have amnesia.

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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What is cowboy say

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops