Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

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what is more funny than watching a baby fly in a circle at 100 mph stopping it with a shovel

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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whats worse than bitting into ur apple and finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just murded noddy and his family who were making a nice little home in there

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Why did Colnel Sanders cross the road? Colnel Ryan Sanders crossed the road to attack Taliban fighters who were endangering his military presence.

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A man finds a magic lamp and rubs it. A genie appears and says that he will grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish for a duck". POOF! He got a duck. Then he says "I wish for a penguin". POOF! A penguin magically appears. He thought long and hard for his 3rd wish. Then he said "I wish I had a turtle" POOF! Suddenly out of nowhere the genie disappears. The man looked inside the magic lamp and saw a small turtle. The end.

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Two homosexuals walk into a bedroom, and begin to have sex.

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what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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Q: Why are all black people fast? A: Because the slow ones are in jail.

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

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a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

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What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 8 9. I'm just counting

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There are 2 men are standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is named Peter

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whats funnier than anti jokes nothing

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Why was the 7 year old girl crying? Because its hard to laugh during gang rape.

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What Do You Call a Black Man With a Gun?? A Cop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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