Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

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What ever happened to the bartender that asked, "Why the long face?" He was punched hard on the face for asking a stupid cliche!

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A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he needed to get to the other side and he was using a crosswalk

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How did Helen Keller's Parents punished her? The put a doorknob on her door.

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What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? She was dead

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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Ich bin nicht der Anführer

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

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Why did 9/11 take place? Because God hates Satan

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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